proud.

so today i went to my office's 2nd annual retreat. it's a day to have some fun. yes, some work topics were discussed but most of the day was spent eating and playing games! and something struck me on the way home. a new surge of excitement for my career. a sense of empowerment. a huge feeling of pride for the profession i have chosen. i felt this way after attending ons congress this year. oncology nursing society
it's nice to have these days. to remember why my job is so important and that everyday is worth it regardless of how stressed out i may get. that it's all about the patient. that their frustrations and anger are not intentionally directed at me, although i do tend to take it personally. what can i say, i'm a people pleaser.
that i have a thirst for knowledge and i need to work on learning more. oncology is such an exciting field. definitely scary, overwhelming, and sad. but at the same time hopeful. there are so many new treatments and drug types that are being developed that it is amazing.
i want to try to figure out a way to study and read research articles. to implement a study schedule. i tend to get so tired of chemo that i shy away from it when i come home. i need that downtime. a time for me. but i also need to grow. to learn. to absorb as much as i can about this topic that is sooo fascinating. to become a better nurse and resource for my patients. i want to be able to support and help them to the best of my abilities. and to do so, i need to keep up on the latest discoveries. i must set a schedule or find online resources or even find the time to do the zillion ce's that come in the mail every month. not just for myself but for my patients....